Monday (tomorrow) is the first day of school. Big Brother is starting 3rd grade and Ballerina and Music Man are entering 1st grade. All 3 are still in the same school and I think all of them are looking forward to the return of routine. And for the last week or so, we have been doing the normal "preparing" for another school year.
Before the end of last year, I had a conference with Music Man's teacher. I knew he was struggling in most ways (non-academic) and I asked the question if he needed to repeat kindergarten. I was wondering if he had the social maturity to advance with his classmates. His teacher explained that he was definitely ready to move on to first grade and that she truly believed he was going to be successful. That year, her class was a combined kindergarten/first grade class (8 kindergarteners, 3 1st graders). I followed up that first question if she thought she would keep Music Man in her class should she have a combined class again. And she told me that she didn't believe so. The way it was determined who would stay with her and who would move to the other teacher for that year indicated that Music Man would be moving on. And, at the time, she wasn't sure if she would have any first graders in her classroom (she's basically a kindergarten teacher after all).
But as the year was about to end, she brought Music Man to the car and mentioned that it appeared that they were getting more kindergarteners for the Learning Center than one teacher could teach adequately. In this 5 minute conversation, she indirectly suggested that she may keep Music Man in her class after all for first grade, should she have a combined class again. She felt, at that time, that he may benefit with another year in her classroom (but he would still be a first grader).
On Thursday, she called me. She wanted to inform me before I saw it through other means that she would be Music Man's teacher again this year. When I first heard this, I was THRILLED. This is a teacher that he knows and likes. He understands what she expects from him and he already knows what he can get away with and when she will put her foot down (for the record, he can't get away with much of ANYTHING). Her reputation is untouchable, and the reputation is well earned. We saw a great deal of growth in him all year long and, despite still having many issues that we need to address, we felt he had a very successful year last year. And they did this combined class just last year, so I knew that the teachers and staff were comfortable handling the transitions that are necessary (as the first graders are more integrated with the general education students than the kindergarteners).
But the more I think about it, the more I am concerned. I'm still 10000% thrilled that she's his teacher, but I wonder about the thought process that made her keep him in her classroom. He is very bright and more than satisfies the criteria to be a first grader. That isn't in question. But he is very big for his age (not just tall) and he will definitely stick out in this classroom of younger students. Does he care? Absolutely NOT. He doesn't notice anything that has any social context to it. From a social standpoint, he's probably closer to a 3 year old than a 6 year old. He is very much an isolationist (if you can call a child by that description) and really has no desire to have friends or peer interactions. He is a bit of a challenge with his behaviors and his phobias and the kindergarteners in the classroom may be better choices for his peers than the first graders that were in his class last year.
Once again, I need to learn to put my own perception of things to the side and try to see things from my child's point of view. He will still do his thing and will be quite successful I have no doubt. And 2 years with this teacher is a prize that I cherish. I think that, once I see how things work in practice, I'll be more and more comfortable with this arrangement.
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