My Family's Experience with Autism: Would You Consider This "Separation Anxiety"?

Monday, October 19, 2009

Would You Consider This "Separation Anxiety"?

I think I may have figured out part of my problem earlier today.....

I need to lose the illusion that I'll be able to keep Rachel and Simon together for long. I always imagined that they'd be sharing a room until they were 6 or so......that they'd be in the same preschool and kindergarten classes (maybe even 1st or 2nd grade)......yeah, I was planning on enrolling them in separate enrichment programs to help them develop separate identities. But I really wanted to foster the bond between them that not many others have seen, but I have witnessed it regularly as have several other family members. It's somewhat magical to me and something that not too many others can fully understand.

Starting this summer, I have had to separate them into different programs. Rachel is doing the 1-on-1 CSAAC ABA. Simon is still in the classroom and also receiving some in-home PT (usually while Rachel is getting her ABA session). We are now looking into the appropriate preschool programs for them. Once again, I was told that they would probably need to be in separate programs because their needs are so different, but silly me, I'm hopeful that I can find a program that would be good for BOTH of them, simultaneously. But, as I mentioned in a previous post, Rachel may do all right in MPAC, but I recognize it's not the best option for her. And Simon will be LOST if I sent him to CAPP. I still haven't gone to visit the PEP programs yet, but that's considered a less ideal option for both of them right now.

Additionally, lately I've been wondering if I need to consider separating them at night. Simon has so many sleep issues I'm concerned that it's causing Rachel to not get the sleep that she needs. I've been able to justify keeping them together up until now because I don't typically hear Rachel during the night when Simon begins his escapades. But last night Rachel took her turn at wakefulness and Simon didn't stay asleep the way Rachel typically does. If we are going to start seeing things happening in this direction, we need to consider moving one of them into the 4th bedroom (probably Simon).

So, I have to lose my illusion that they will be spending extended periods of time together. In other words, I need to stop being selfish!

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A Little Bit About Me and My Family

Every once in a while, something happens to a family that seems to change everything, whether that change is positive, negative, or in an uncertain direction. One such thing happened to us in March 2009, when we were informed our 26 month old twins (girl/boy) were BOTH on the autism spectrum. Their older brother (nearly 4 at the time) had always been ahead of the curve for most developmental milestones, so we had never really considered that some of the delays the twins were having had anything to do with autism. Well, we were wrong. Since then we have been learning about learning techniques and doing everything we can to make sure they get any and all help they need so that they can live normal lives. This blog chronicles that journey.

The Autism Pizza

I don't know where this came from originally, but I found it on a post on Circle of Moms. It's a good explanation of how things line up on the spectrum.

1. The Crust: Lack of Social Interaction (poor eye contact, not sharing interests with you, no pointing/gesturing)

2. The Sauce: Impaired Communication (possibly no speech, poor conversation skills, repetitive language, echolalia, no make-believe play)

3. The Cheese: Stereotypical Activities & Interests (extreme routine, strong interest in certain things, stimming [flapping, atypical play, etc.] -- like spinning wheels, lining toys up, stacking, etc.)

If you have all of those things: crust, sauce, cheese, you made an Autism pizza. It might have different toppings, but you can look at it and know it's still a pizza. If your pizza doesn't have sauce, that's Aspergers's. If your pizza is missing more than that but still kind of looks like a pizza, that's PDD-NOS (Pervasive Developmental Disorder, Not Otherwise Specified)